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Showing posts with label books. Show all posts
Showing posts with label books. Show all posts

Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Ridiculous, amazing DARK SHADOWS book covers from Germany


DARK SHADOWS has had several lives outside of the original 1966-1971 television series. Even as the show was charting new (and frequently contradictory) timelines, its peripheral feature films, comic books, comic strips, novels and audio dramas adopted policies of charting their own unique narratives. It's possible to be a longtime fan of DARK SHADOWS without ever having seen the original television show.

For a lot of counties, watching the TV series was never an option. DARK SHADOWS has always been an unwieldy beast, and few markets were willing (or able) to make room in their schedules for 150 minutes of programming each week for the daily serial. But that didn't stop Barnabas Collins from eventually going globe hopping.

In Germany, DARK SHADOWS found a second life in pulp magazines. The Paperback Library published 32 DARK SHADOWS novels written by Marilyn Ross, some of which were later recycled as content for German horror- and gothic-themed pulp digests.

The first book to be published in Germany was Ross's first DARK SHADOWS novel from 1967, re-titled "Der Witwenhügel" (which refers to "Widows Hill" located near Collinwood). The novel was reprinted as part of the Gaslicht series in 1973.

The next books in the series, "Victoria Winters" (“Keine Gnade für Victoria”), "Strangers at Collins House" (“Die Fremde im Collins-Haus”), and "The Mystery of Collinwood" (“Das Haus über der Todesklippe”) would be published out-of-order in Gaslicht,

The misadventures of Barnabas Collins, though, would find their way to the Vampir: Horror Roman series in 1977 and 1978, usually featuring cover art that looked like something from Marvel's TOMB OF DRACULA comics. Below is a sampling of covers from that series. Look carefully and you'll spot Arnold Schwarzenegger on the back cover of the first photo.

The final image in this post is from the Dämonen-Land series, which published its first issue in 1989.

(Note: Many of these images made their first appearance on this site back in 2012. I was unable to learn much about their origins at the time, though.)

"Barnabas Collins and the Mysterious Ghost."
"The Secret of Barnabas Collins" and "Barnabas Collins and the Mysterious Ghost."
"Barnabas, Quentin and the Avenging Ghost" and "Barnabas, Quentin and the Haunted Cave"
"Barnabas, Quentin and the Nightmare Assassin"and "The Peril of Barnabas Collins"
"The Phantom and Barnabas Collins" and "The Demon of Barnabas Collins"
"Barnabas Collins" and "The Foe of Barnabas Collins"
"Barnabas Collins"
"Barnabas Collins"

Monday, November 4, 2013

VAMPIRE PAPER DOLLS (or "Flat Stanley Goes to Hell')



Published way back in 2010 (did they even have electricity back then?) VAMPIRE PAPER DOLLS is a softback book containing two "paper dolls" and 29 character costumes designed to illustrate the history of vampires. Because I'm mentioning this book on a site called THE COLLINSPORT HISTORICAL SOCIETY (or maybe because you saw those photos at the top of the page) you've already figured out that Barnabas Collins makes an appearance. The original Jonathan Frid portrayal of the character is featured alongside other such figures as Dracula, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Count Mamuwalde, Varney the Vampire, Bill Compton from TRUE BLOOD and (sigh) Edward from TWILIGHT.

All I'm saying is: FLAT STANLEY better watch his ass.

You can get VAMPIRE PAPER DOLLS on Amazon for $8.99, or significantly cheaper from some of their affiliate vendors.)

Friday, January 25, 2013

Coming Soon: Down and Out in Beverly Heels


KATHRYN LEIGH SCOTT has a new book shipping in March. DOWN AND OUT IN BEVERLY HEELS is her second novel, and is about ... well, here's the Amazon product listing:

Former actress Meg Barnes used to have it all: tony Beverly Hills address, Amex Black card, Manolos for every day of the month. Not to mention a career as a popular TV detective that made her glittering life possible. 

But her lifestyle of the rich and famous has turned into a reality show for d-listed starlets. Lost in her Louboutins, she has one man to thank: her con man of a husband.Handsome FBI agent Jack Mitchell knows a suspect when he sees one—even if she’s as beautiful and gutsy as Meg. 

Meg’s ex “made off” with half of Hollywood’s wealth in an epic real estate scam. And Jack thinks Meg may have been involved.Determined to prove her innocence Meg teams up with her quirky, movie-mad best friend to track down her fugitive husband and exact justice.

But getting her life, and her career, back on track is harder than auditioning for Spielberg. Especially when her life is threatened. Meg has to trust Jack, the man who may want her behind bars…or as his leading lady for life.

The novel will be available March 26 from Amazon in both paper and Kindle editions. Scott is also offering a signed bookmark to customers with a Proof of Purchase from Amazon. Visit www.kathrynleighscott.com for details.

Scott's first novel, DARK PASSAGES, was published last summer.

Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Book Report: The Salem Branch

Reading a book written by an actress sounds about as much fun as watching a professional chef teach himself to play saxophone. I'm sure it's fun if you're the one holding the sax, but it's as satisfying as a lap dance for those of us in the audience. Regardless of how fond I might be of Lara Parker, I didn't have any interest in watching her (or anyone else) pass off their learning process as entertainment.

After a dozen Marilyn Ross novels, though, I ran out of reasons not to see what Parker had to bring to the table. A first-time novelist can't be any worse than a someone like Ross, who was more passionate about how fast he could crank out a story than in, you know, telling a good story. To paraphrase H.P. Lovecraft's thoughts on Robert Chambers, the most frustrating thing about Ross's DARK SHADOWS novels is how easily they could have been made better.

Circumstances eventually paved the way that made me a little more open to the idea of reading THE SALEM BRANCH.
For a few months in 2011 I had an hour-long commute to work in Lumberton, N.C. When you're driving at 3 a.m., you feel like the only person on the planet. Some people can't handle that level of placid isolation. As a card carrying misanthropist, though, I loved it. What I didn't love so much was the drive home in the afternoon. It was hot as hell and the traffic was bumper-to-bumper on the interstate at 80 mph. But, this wasn't the problem.

When you're awake at three in the morning, three in the afternoon feels like your biorhythms have been wrapped in a wet towel. When your body's ready to shut down, energy drinks, sunlight, danger and your least favorite Mötorhead album won't be enough to keep you awake. More than once I found myself nodding off behind the wheel as my car rocketed down the highway at 80 mph. I was too tired to be scared, but knew there was a problem.

Big Finish came to the rescue. I'd been interested in their products for a while, but didn't have a lot of time to sit and stare into space for an hour at a time to listen to their original audio dramas. The commute to Lumberton changed that and, within a few weeks, I'd breezed through about half of their DARK SHADOWS inventory. And that included the two releases that comprised the reading of Parker's first novel, ANGELIQUE'S DESCENT.

It ... wasn't great.

ANGELIQUE'S DESCENT wasn't a total waste of time, though. Big Finish wisely chopped the book into two volumes. The second contains Parker's retelling of the 1795 storyline, though its a version of the tale that's been gutted of nuance. It also includes a few ridiculous additions to the melodrama (Spoiler Alert: Angelique and Josette are really ... SISTERS!

But the first half of the story, the part that has no significant obligations to the television show's continuity, wasn't bad. It was fairly compelling, reading (at times) like Margaret Mitchell filtered through WEIRD TALES. It tells the story of Angelique's childhood, when she was held in bondage by a Caribbean farmer who used her as a figurehead "goddess" in voodoo rituals to keep his slaves docile. It was spooky and the stakes felt significant, but it never felt much like DARK SHADOWS. Afterward, I wasn't doing cartwheels about the idea of reading THE SALEM BRANCH.

I'm not made of stone. Put Jonathan Frid on the cover of a book and, sooner or later, I'm bound to read it. I'd probably abandon all of my values and read a Dan Brown novel if Barnabas made an appearance. It's not something I'm proud of, but it's true. (Note: STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM DARK SHADOWS, MR. BROWN.)

THE SALEM BRANCH represents a huge step forward for Parker as a writer. Set in two time periods, the book attempts to elaborate on the relationship between Angelique/Miranda DuVal and warlock Judah Zachary, while following "modern" Collinwood in the years after the original series ended in 1970. I never understood the connection between Miranda/Angelique (it always seemed like sloppy storytelling to me on the part of the show's writers) and THE SALEM BRANCH didn't do much to erase my confusion. Fortunately, the two time periods have little to do with each other narratively, but they created a decent amount of tension as the two tales unfolded.

What I liked about the book was Parker's grasp of characterization. While still sympathetic, Barnabas is painted as a man damned by his own contradictory nature. As the story begins he's once again human, though troubled by his own frailties. He's also beginning to regret promises made to his fiancee, Julia Hoffman, mostly because he knows he lacks the strength of character to follow through with them.

The crazy (sometimes silly) story elements are in keeping with the crazy silliness of the original show and don't feel out of place (as did the twists in ANGELIQUE'S DESCENT.) Barnabas and David unknowingly try pot brownies, vampires, zombies and (gasp!) hippies roam the grounds of Collinwood, and the rivalry between Barnabas and Quentin is revived as a woman who might be Angelique moves into town. The flashback story might be a little grim, but the "modern" stuff is a hoot.

Admittedly, I might be a little beaten down after 2012. The Tim Burton movie was a disappointment and the DARK SHADOWS comics from Dynamite have gone downhill faster (and nastier) than the contents of a ruptured sewage line at Mordor. I might have been easy pickings.

Still, THE SALEM BRANCH represents one of the few times we've been allowed to return to Collinwood than didn't make me want to cry myself to sleep in a dark room. It was good enough to make me look forward to her follow up, WOLF MOON RISING, though it appears to have been pushed back a year to October, 2013. I'd also be interested in reading a book from her that wasn't about DARK SHADOWS, hint hint if you're reading this, Mrs. Parker.

Tuesday, August 28, 2012

Book Report: DARK SHADOWS by Marilyn Ross

A word of warning: I'm about to spoil the plot of a 46-year-old book.

As you might know, I'm presently revisiting the early days of DARK SHADOWS, and thought it was a good time to take another look at the early Marilyn Ross novels. Published a few months after the launch of the television show in 1966 (and running until after the cancellation of DARK SHADOWS in 1971), fans of the program have an uneasy relationship these books. They kinda-sorta feel like the DARK SHADOWS we know and love, but suffer from a manic sense of continuity and arbitrary deviations from the television's story. The original series produced some of the wildest, craziest programming to ever be broadcast on television, but the books felt like the daytime show's heavily medicated sibling. Once in a while the books forget to take their meds (resulting in stories like the batshit insane BARNABAS, QUENTIN AND THE BODY SNATCHERS) but too often they're a snooze.

Part of the problem of the first book in this series, simply titled DARK SHADOWS, is that it's tired ground. Victoria Winters arriving at Collinwood and discovering it's mysterious inhabitants? Been there. Done that. Can we just get to Barnabas Collins already?

As is the case with the other Marilyn Ross books in this series, the novel reads like the second-generation retread that it is. Ross lived in Canada and didn't get to watch the television show, so the books have the uneven desperation of a bad liar. The usual cast of characters is present and accounted for, only their literary  interpretations are significantly muted. David Collins suffers the most, and is downgraded from juvenile sociopath to a milquetoast brat. Burke Devlin gets mentioned for reasons that are anybody's guess (he plays no role in the story) while a few new characters are added to the mix to serve as exposition machines.

Inhabiting the spooky halls of Collins House (I know) are Elizabeth Stoddard, her daughter Carolyn, her brother Roger and his son, David, and Ernest Collins. Yes, Ernest Collins. He's a professional violinist and some kind of cousin to Elizabeth and Roger, though it's never quite explained how he's related to the central family. I pictured him as the mutant offspring of Ted McGinley and Robbie Rist.

The other details are mostly the same as the television show. Victoria is invited by the Collins family to become the governess for David. The mystery of her past is touched on once or twice, but the suspense in this book is tepid and unfocused. Victoria mostly just wanders from scene to scene as the "plot" unfolds.

Upon her arrival at Collins House (ugh) Victoria strikes up a seriously inappropriate relationship with Ernest Collins. Bad shit tends to happen around cousin Ernest. His first wife, Elaine, was killed in a car crash. A girlfriend jumped off Widow's Hill. Another girlfriend got her face smashed in by someone with a grudge and a length of chain. It should come as no surprise that similarly bad shit starts to happen to/around Victoria, though with a much lower rate of success. Someone knocks her unconscious while exploring the west wing, her car suffers mechanical failure and crashes on the way into town, someone breaks into her bedroom and vandalizes it, etc. She survives these attempts on her life through her wits, and is constantly one step ahead of ... nevermind. That's Clarice Starling I'm thinking of. The literary Victoria Winters survives these attempts on her life through blind luck and having an especially thick skull.

As in it's television counterpart, Liz is protective of something hidden in the cellar. Unlike the TV show, though, Liz doesn't believe she's hiding the body of her dead husband. Instead, the family is keeping Ernest's first wife locked up. She not only survived the car crash that "killed" her, but she came out of the accident stark-raving insane, too. Rather than putting her in a medical institution where she could receive proper healthcare, the Collins family opted to keep her locked in the basement of Collins House (ugh.) And by "locked," I mean she pretty much comes and goes as she pleases. All the bad shit that happened to Ernest's other ladies was the work of this lunatic.

The end of the book coincidentally resembles the final episode of the TV series. Elaine walks Victoria at knifepoint to a terrace at the top of Collins House (sigh) where she plans to make the governess leap to her death. Because this is a Marilyn Ross book, Ernest shows up at the last minute and saves the day. Nobody much gives a shit. Skip this one and move directly to #6 in the series, BARNABAS COLLINS.

Friday, June 15, 2012

An interview with DARK SHADOWS novelist Dan Ross, 1969



Dan Ross: Man Of Many Words

In a basement in Saint John he's turning it out 115 novels and 600 short stories published in 22 countries in 13 languages in the last seven years

By N. R. Dreskin
Weekend Magazine, May 10, 1969

"I try to take a break of 24 hours after I finish a book before starting the next one." says Dan Ross, a 56-year-old actor-turned-writer of Saint John. "Of course, you can't afford to dawdle around when you've promised to deliver another novel before the end of the month."

And before the listener has a chance to grasp the enormity of this statement — after all, writers usually take a year or more to do a book — Ross adds, almost as an afterthought:
"Then there are the short stories to turn out every week. But I'm not complaining. The writing's going well."

Indeed it is. With 115 novels and over 600 short stories published in the past seven years in 22 countries and 13 languages, Dan Ross now ranks among the world's most prolific writers — living or dead. Three years ago, when he was on his 50th novel, the authoritative New York Times Book Review called him "one of the most formidable writing factories in this or any other hemisphere." Obviously Ross has staying power.

But who recalls reading any of his books recently?

"I'm probably Canada's most read unknown writer," he admits in his mild, objective way. "But that's because I use so many pen names. Editors insisted on them for my different types of novels and because I was producing for many publishers.

"As a result I may have eight books on a newsstand — and not one of them with my own name.
"I'm Rose Dana and Rose Williams for the nurse books; Marilyn Ross— that's my wife's name — for the Gothic mysteries involving a heroine and the setting of an old castle or remote ancient mansion; Dan Roberts and Tex Steele for westerns; then for the modern novels, romances and general mysteries I'm Ellen Randolph, Jane Daniels, Jane Rossiter, Clarissa Ross, Ruth Dorset, Leslie Ames, W. E. D. Ross, W. E. Dan Ross and Dan Ross."


Writers are notorious for thinking up reasons for not facing the typewriter. But Ross goes all out to meet his deadlines. On a Monday morning not long ago, Donald MacCampbell, a veteran New York literary agent, phoned him.

"Dan, I've had a call for a., nurse book. They're in a bit of a rush." The agent hesitated only momentarily after this monstrous understatement.

"Do you suppose I can have it by next week?"

"I'll get right onto it," Ross promised.

He laid aside the mystery novel he was currently working at and began to write the nurse novel.

The following Monday, a bundle of some 300 typed pages, the manuscript for a 75,000-word novel, reached MacCampbell's desk in New York. In due time it found its way to drugstore and newsstand racks, circulating libraries and bookstores both on this continent and abroad. At last report it had sold some quarter-million copies. 

This feat is by no means unusual for Dan Ross. He has written a novel in five days.

"I don't like writing under such pressure," he says. "1 prefer to take more time over a book. Two weeks is just fine."

Producers of the highly rated ABCTV Dark Shadows television series picked Ross to write novels based on the show. Those featuring the character Barnabas Collins, a 175-year-old vampire that "America loves to hate", have been especially successful.  Under the Marilyn Ross byline they have sold over 2.5-million copies. According to Hy Steirman, Montreal-born publisher of Paperback Library, one of the largest of its kind in the U.S., "Dan is the foremost writer today of Gothics, a field normally dominated by women authors. Working with him is a delight; he has an old-fashioned respect for an editor's skill, and always delivers on time. He's an editor's dream."

But to earn this label, Ross operates on a nightmarish schedule. He isolates himself in a wood-panelled, soundproofed basement room about nine feet square. Piles of manuscripts, books and magazines take up most of the space. He works seated on a small sofa, typewriter on lap. He doesn't have to crowd himself like that. The tastefully furnished two-story, nine-room home overlooking the Bay of Fundy is occupied only by Dan and Marilyn Ross. And their white-haired West Highland terrier, Jolly. They have no children.

"I like it cosy for writing," Dan explains.

He submerges to the "writing room" soon after breakfast, reads and looks after his correspondence, begins to write by 11 . He takes a short break for lunch, returns to the machine, and works through until 7 when the Rosses dine. There is wine, lively conversation then a short walk with Jolly on the leash.

"Very relaxing," Ross enthuses. "Do you know, a psychiatrist once told me that a three-minute walk with a dog is worth 50 minutes of psychoanalysis? So far it's kept me away from the couch. Every writer should own a dog!"

But after the walk, it's down to business once more in the basement, not to surface again until midnight.And usually, by that time, he has banged out a minimum of 10,000 words. "Much, much more when I have to," he adds, "but my two typing fingers get awfully sore. I write by the clock and don't wait around for inspiration. How else can 1 keep my commitment to editors?" (Expatriate novelist Arthur Hailey has stated his output to be a 'couple of typed pages a day, about 500 words. It took him three years to do Hotel.)

While Ross is hammering it out downstairs, Marilyn is far from idle upstairs. She shields him from phone calls, edits his copy and specializes in checking his nurse books since she is a graduate nurse. She also does research into background material for Dan's novels, saving him the precious hours for actual writing.

"And she keeps my characters' names straight," Dan says, stressing its importance. "I'm always getting their names mixed up. Sybil, the heroine in my current book suddenly becomes Elsie who was the heroine in my lust book. That sort of thing.

"And Marilyn acts as my first reader. I never tell her the outcome of my plots and the story's got to hold her interest all the way through. If it doesn't, then I'll change it. But that applies just to my novels. I've found that those of my short stories she does not like are the ones that go over best with the editors. Go figure it out."

Dan maintains his grueling morning-to-midnight schedule more often than not on a seven-day week basis, although once in a while he'll quit at 9 PM to catch the last show at a local movie. But it's not all work and no play for the Rosses. Every couple of months they take a few days off to visit New York.

To ex-actor Dan Ross, New York is Broadway and the stage. He’s a chronic first-nighter. And, in fact, he credits much of his success as a novelist to his experience in the theatre.

On graduation from Saint John High School, he studied drama at the Provincetown Playhouse in New York's Greenwich Village, played summer stock throughout New England for eight years, then returned home to form his own company. He wrote, directed and acted. During the war he served with ENSA, the entertainment unit, then afterwards ran a film distribution agency. When television made inroads into that career he began to write short stories in 1957.

"I wrote, wrote and wrote. And most of it came back, back, back," he recalls ruefully. "In my first two years 1 grossed about S500." Then he began to click— just as the short fiction field showed signs of waning. Switching his main effort to the novel, he published his first one, Summer Season, based on his experience in summer stock, in 1962. He was then 49, a late starter as novelists go. He has written several novels with a Saint John locale, including The Fog And The Stars, Bridge To Love and Fog Island. Other Maritime locales include Halifax (Satan's Rock) and Cape Breton (CameronCastle). Citadel Of Love and Castle On The Hill are based on the Quebec scene.


But most of his books have a New England background.

"I aim my writing primarily at the U.S. and British reader because that's where the major markets are," he explains. "None of my novels has ever been published in the original by a Canadian house. I am not a product of Canadian publishing."

And yet, Ross claims he would not want to live elsewhere than in Saint John. He comes from Loyalist stock and his family has lived there for generations. "I work well here. I enjoy particularly my close friendships with the local art colony. There is a quieter pace of living. I think we've been able to retain a little more of the graciousness that flavors life. Nice people in nice homes. Does that sound old-fashioned and square? I don't care. I feel strongly about it."

Ross's output is such that he requires two New York agents, as well as representatives in the U.K., Sweden and South Africa. Discussing this flood of wordage, a recent interviewer asked Dan Ross if he objected to the description of a "hack writer". Ross thought carefully about that one before answering.

"I honestly don't think I'm a hack. A true hack is motivated entirely by money and I'm not. Of course I do make a lot of money, as much as a successful business executive, but I've never written anything that was not sincere. I write primarily to express my viewpoint on life, and to entertain.

"As an entertainer, I write escapist fiction. And what's wrong with escapism? You eat a meal to escape hunger. You read a novel of mystery or romance to escape boredom or worry.

"In my serious novels, my message is one of decency, without the sermonizing. So many writers now accentuate violence and sex. They ignore the basically good and decent people, the way they live and their standards of behavior. I think it's important that these people be represented in today's fiction. And always in an interesting, readable way. I avoid the heavy prose and navel-contemplation so many novelists seem to favor today."

Publisher Hy Steirman attributes Ross's success as a novelist to "his ability to transmit a dramatic flair, glamor and excitement to his characters. We get a lot of fan mail from his writings, mostly from women asking for a list of his books." Paperback Library is understandably excited over Ross. Over 2.5 million of the TV show Dark Shadows novels have been sold, and Ross is turning them out with his usual dispatch. It prompted the New York Times Book Review last November to ask: "And who says Gothic romance is dead?"

To would-be writers, Ross has offered this advice:

"First, make sure you have some ability in this direction. And be ready to work harder at developing it than anybody on a 9-to-5 job. And second, don't flounder around but get professional help. I had a couple of correspondence courses and they did save me a lot of time in learning my craft."

Boston University's Mugar Memorial Library has honored Dan Ross by establishing a "Dan Ross Collection". It will eventually include all his published works, manuscripts, correspondence and notebooks.

But he has no illusions about his place in literature.

"I expect I'll be remembered, if at all, as a writer who turned out an unusual quantity of fiction which entertained for a time," he says matter-of-factly. "And I suppose my chief claim to fame is my speed in producing novels." 

To date, at least, his awesome creativity places him well in the forefront of mass producers of popular literature. French writer Georges Simenon, now 65, has written over 500 books, and now does six a year. American novelist Edgar Rice Burroughs, creator of the Tarzan stories, completed about 60 books at his death at 74. The late Edgar Wallace produced 150 works, including plays, in 27 years and once dictated a complete novel over a weekend. John Creasey, a 60-year-old English writer, famed for his Commander Gideon Of Scotland Yard series, has published close to 400 books in 36 years; he achieved his peak production in 1940 with 18 novels.

Ross's use of various pen names does cause some confusion from time to time. Recently an American woman tourist in England picked up one of his novels in a bookstore. It bore his name as author. On her return home she bought a paperback at the newsstand one day. It had a different title. And the author's name was Jane Rossiter. But the story was exactly the same.

"A brazen case of literary theft," she wrote angrily to Dan Ross, care of the English publisher. "I hope you take her to court!"

"I thanked her and promised to look into it. And I sent her some books for her trouble," says Dan Ross. "It was much simpler than trying to explain that I couldn't sue myself."

Sunday, May 6, 2012

Barnabas and Company now available on Amazon

The revised edition of Barnabas and Company by authors Craig Hamrick and R.J. Jamison is now available for sale on Amazon. The Kindle edition has been available for several weeks, while the revised paperback (expanded to almost 600 pages from its original 2003 publication) just his Amazon's virtual shelves during the last few days. (Get the book HERE.)

Amazon currently has the book discounted at almost 50% off its list price, and has an extensive sample available for online review. So far, word on Barnabas and Company is resoundingly favorable, and I'll share my thoughts on the book later this week (once my copy arrives.)

Hamrick is also the author of Big Lou, the biography of Dark Shadows star Louis Edmonds, while Jamison wrote A Hard Act to Follow, the biography of actress Grayson Hall.

You can find the official Facebook page for Barnabas and Company HERE.

Thursday, May 3, 2012

So, I'm reading Lara Parker's The Salem Branch ...

 
I picked up a copy of Lara Parker's novel, The Salem Branch, at a local Barnes and Noble recently. Many of the chains have a snazzy Dark Shadows display, which you can see in my photo above. I'm not sure why Dracula is in the table ... the first collection of the Dynamite comicbook series is now on sale and would have fit the space nicely, but I digress.

I'm only a hundred pages into the The Salem Branch and came across a scene I had to share:

Barnabas Collins and David eat pot brownies.

That's not hyperbole, or some lame attempt on my own part to be funny. Barnabas and David really do eat pot brownies in this book. Plus there's some business about Angelique using a thimble full of her own urine to make a love potion, Barnabas having to get actual job now that his career is a vampire is mostly over, and a little bit of Judah Zackary-on-Angelique spanking.

This book is bizarre. These details won't spoil the story for you, but hopefully it's enough to let you know whether or not you want to read the book. Honestly, if someone told me there was a book where Barnabas and David eat pot brownies, I would have fought like a bastard to win a copy on Ebay years ago.

Because I haven't finished it, I can't speak with any authority on its overall contents or quality, but will get back to you soon with a full review.

Just thought I'd share.

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Varney the Vampire Vs. Barnabas Collins



Dark Shadows was mixing acids and bases long before Seth Grahame-Smith came onto the scene.

The “author” of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, Seth Grahame-Smith took the public domain Jane Austin novel and injected it was a little zombie mayhem.  It was dumb fun for smart people and would be better liked if it wasn’t for all of the cash-in garbage that followed it. Seriously … who the f*k was asking for Little Women and Werewolves?

While it’s yet to be determined if Grahame-Smith has what it takes to be a screenwriter, he’s otherwise a good choice to pen the Dark Shadows movie. The original television show began as homage to Jane Eyre, but the show really became interesting when Dan Curtis decided to add a vampire to the cast. It’s likely that Curtis had Dracula on his mind when Barnabas Collins was first discussed but the character has much more in common with an earlier vampire named Varney.

Varney the Vampire, Vol. 1
“Varney the Vampire; or, the Feast of Blood” was serialized in a penny dreadful magazine starting in 1845. The penny dreadfuls were the precursors to comic books and soap operas, providing lurid entertainment to the masses in serialized installments. But the similarities between Varney the Vampire and Dark Shadows run much deeper than format.

Sir Francis Varney is a troubled soul and a man cursed to be a vampire for his misdeeds during the English Civil War.  After moving into a home adjacent to their estate, he begins to harass the Bannerworths, an aristocratic family in decline. His connection to the Bannerworths might be more than just neighborly, though, given that Varney bears a striking relationship to the portrait of Marmaduke Bannerworth hanging in the family’s mansion. All of that should sound more than a little familiar to fans of Dark Shadows.

Varney the Vampire is a sprawling, messy epic that is much better than it is usually given credit for. Never intended to be collected as a novel, the “book” is really a series of lengthy vignettes that build and finish story arcs before moving the characters into new territory. Comic book fans will even recognize the occasional “filler” installment as the story pauses to allow for the inclusion of a short story, usually told by one of the story’s characters (the best of the bunch might be a story about vampire pirates.)

Varney the Vampire might not be great fiction, but that’s hardly a reason to avoid it. As much as I love Dracula, I can’t argue that it’s an especially well-written story, but it still remains effective more than a century later. Varney the Vampire has also has its merits and, like Dark Shadows, remains compelling in spite of (and because of) its funky style storytelling.

Monday, March 26, 2012

Read the first chapter of Dark Shadows: Angelique’s Descent for free

Tor Books is re-releasing Lara Parker's novel Angelique's Descent in April. First published in 1998 by Harper Collins, Parker's first novel, as well as it's follow-up, The Salem Branch, are being released with new cover artwork in anticipation of the upcoming Dark Shadows film.

Tor currently has the first chapter of Angelique's Descent posted for free at their website. I suspect people buying the book after seeing the new movie will be surprised at this profoundly unfunny tale of child abuse, murder and romantic betrayal.

Saturday, March 24, 2012

Barnabas, Quentin and the Crystal Coffin

The Spoiler-Ridden Synopsis

     “How long will Collinwood’s evil forces allow Betty Ward to search for her sister’s killer?
     Heiress Betty Ward is worried about her twin sister, who has eloped with Jeremy Frene. She followed them from Paris to the Frene estate at Collinwood - but arrives too late!
     Her twin is dead, victim of a mysterious illness. Her body has been sealed in a crystal coffin and kept in a darkened room. Jeremy swears that because her ghost returns to the castle each night, he refuses to bury the coffin.
     Betty is convinced her sister’s death was not a natural one. Jeremy’s aunt opposed the marriage. Her ally against the couple seems to have been Quentin Collins, a suspected werewolf.
     Betty turns to Barnabas Collins for help, despite the rumors that he is a vampire. But she does not realize that by doing so, she has placed herself in mortal danger …”
(From the book jacket)

The above synopsis resolves much of the novel’s mystery before the reader has even opened the book, but there are still a few gems to be mined from the pages of Barnabas, Quentin and the Crystal Coffin.

Stephen King has said that every horror movie, no matter how terrible it might be, has a message. These messages are sometimes unintentional, he insists, but they’re present if you’re willing to look for them. I can’t say with any certainty that this rule holds water when applied to Marilyn Ross’s Dark Shadows novels, but there’s definitely something taking place beneath the surface of The Crystal Coffin. 

There’s a strange undercurrent of paranoia in this story, and not just the usual “Who’s the Killer?” plot found in most of Ross’s novels. Instead, the story betrays a sense of mistrust in artists, who are all portrayed as eccentric (possibly even homicidal) weirdos. Most of Ross's books are about young women introduced to spooky, hostile environments, so it’s natural the residents of Collinwood are going to be a little odd, regardless of their profession.

But here’s where the thing: As a writer, Ross was an artist of sorts. By placing painters and sculptors among the same ranks as mad scientists and magicians, he betrays a sense of alienation to his own work. The message here is that the mechanics of science and art are equally unfathomable to him. As a writer of pulp romances, nobody expects him to know much about science. But Ross was a hack* who had learned how to pay his bills by writing without ever fully grasping the mechanics of storytelling.

And he’s swinging for the fences in The Crystal Coffin, a book that features some imaginative imagery (and even a solid idea or two.) As you read in the book’s synopsis, Betty Ward spends the first act looking for her twin sister, who has married an American artist she met in Paris. While visiting the city of lights she’s imprisoned by an evil "dwarf" who spends his days making nightmarish wax sculptures. He had made a sculpture of Ward’s missing sister to sell to a suitor she’d rejected, but decides that Betty would fetch a higher price that a wax figure.

I don’t think the fairy tale imagery is a mistake, even though Ross doesn’t always know what to do with it. When Ward later arrives at Frene Castle (one of the many ruined estates that litter the ever-expanding property of Collinwood) she finds that her sister is dead, and has been embalmed and displayed in a glass coffin. Her ghost rises each night to fill blank canvasses with disturbing images that sound like the kind of thing Basil Gogos would admire.

There’s also a werewolf lurking the estate, not to mention the vampire Barnabas Collins, who does nothing terribly vampiric (is that a word?) in this book. Quentin disappears early in the novel, popping up once or twice later in werewolf form. After Barnabas runs the werewolf through with a sword, Quention runs off into the night. We find out later he was part of a plot to kill the young women at Frene Castle, but are never given a reason why he’d participate in the plot or what he had to gain.

There are some fun ideas in The Crystal Coffin, but most of them are underdeveloped. It’s interesting to see how the dark psychology of fairy tales clashes violently with reality. Betty Ward is presented as a “modern women” who rejects superstition, but it’s not superstition that poses a threat to her. Human imagination is the real threat of the story, which makes Ross’s mistrust of artists that much more troubling. I expect these kinds of sentiments from people without creative impulses, but from a professional writer it’s just kind of … sad.

*As a fan of Kenneth Robeson and Walter Gibson, please know that I don’t mean that in a disparaging way.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

The Phantom and Barnabas Collins

For better and worse, Marilyn Ross’s Dark Shadows novels are something special.

Ross penned 32 Dark Shadows novels in five years, incorporating a number of unexpected editorial mandates into the developing storyline. The final products are grotesquely uneven and often read like Grindhouse versions of Harlequin Romance novels. They’re so uneven that I find myself having to explain their tangled concept at the start of these columns, because whatever you know about Dark Shadows will be entirely useless once you enter Ross’s warped version of Collinwood.

It’s fair to say that Ross (whose real name was Dan Ross) had a handful of formulas for his novels, which is a necessary evil when you’re cranking out several books a year. But this isn’t Scooby Doo, where the plots were essentially the same from episode to episode. The Dark Shadows formula was a lot more malleable as new characters were introduced. As with the television series, the novels began as homage to Jane Eyre, but things took a turn for the weird once a vampire entered the picture. The final books in the series bore little resemblance to the first few books as werewolves, witches, mummies and even aliens (!) ran amok at Collinwood.

The Phantom and Barnabas Collins falls somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, combining elements of Victorian horror novels and Jane Eyre-style melodrama. Maggie Evans, taking over the role of heroine from the departed Victoria Winters, falls into a swoon while touring the Collins family crypts and awakes - without explanation - at Collinwood in 1880.
It’s never entirely clear if she remembers her previous life or it she’s just feigning amnesia to avoid looking like a lunatic, but the rest of the 1880 Collins clan are, as expected, up to no good. Dr. Giles Collins spends all of his time in the basement experimenting on the sick and wretched residents of Collinsport. Giles’ wife, Olive, died under mysterious circumstances and might have been a victim of a family curse that is threatening her sister. A phantom in pink appears occasionally to menace Maggie and, getting no satisfactory explanation for the apparition (or any of the other sinister goings on) she turns to Barnabas Collins for help … a man rumored to be a vampire.
Cover of the German release.

By anyone’s definition, the Dark Shadows novels are pulp garbage. But Ross was quite good with dialogue and mood, and from a technical point of view the books are excellently written. The stories might fall apart under the slightest amount of scrutiny once you begin to compare one paragraph to the others around it, but I’ve always enjoyed these books … even at their most ridiculous.
As with the best of the Dark Shadows series, The Phantom and Barnabas Collins could have used another hundred pages to flesh out its story. The characters are interesting enough (while the dialogue isn’t exactly witty, it’s sharp enough for you to always know who is speaking without having to rely on identifiers) but the climax crests so fast it would make even Mickey Spillane’s head spin.

If you’re looking to dive into the Dark Shadows series of novels, The Phantom and Barnabas Collins is as good a place as any to start. There’s no real benefit to reading these books in order of publication because revisions to the television show’s cast caused random, startling changes in the novels (even though the two continuities had almost nothing in common.) Many of the books also take place in flashback, either literally or through use of time travel, making the publication order even less relevant.
I have no doubt that Ross cared little for continuity, and the breakneck pace in which these books were published almost demanded that stories contradict each other. The time travel/flashback stories have a habit of overlapping in ways that are just impossible, specifically how entire families of Collins’s come and go within just a few years of each other.)

And then there’s the trick of having Barnabas Collins being descended from “other” men of the same name. In the television show, Barnabas spent about 170 years chained up inside a coffin and, once awakened, claimed to be his own descendant.
In Ross’s books Barnabas was never a prisoner and has been travelling the world for almost two centuries. Whenever the novels take us into a flashback it always involves an ancestor of Barnabas Collins who is ALSO named Barnabas Collins. It doesn’t matter if it’s 1840, 1880 or 1910 … every Barnabas Collins who’s ever lived has had a son and named him Barnabas Collins. At least, that’s the cover story. Of course every Barnabas is the same guy, because heaven forbid he ever change his name.

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

Barnabas Collins and Quentin's Demon


Marilyn Ross's series of Dark Shadow novels are an odd combination of formula and imagination, two ideals that shouldn't play well together. There's a certain kind of security that comes with reading these books because you always know what you're getting: a young woman arrives at Collinwood, becomes embroiled in the family's violent eccentricities, and well-mannered mayhem ensues.

In Barnabas Collins and Quentin's Demon that woman is Lara Balfour, the daughter of a Boston composer. Shortly before his death her father had struck up a friendship with a fan of his work, Quentin Collins. After her father's funeral Lara accepts an invitation to Collinwood where things get all murdery.

The book introduces Quentin Collins to the constantly shifting canon of Dark Shadows novels. Ross, who reportedly saw very few episodes of Dark Shadows, interpreted Quentin as a dour, controlling and unpleasant man. He has the sideburns, is fond of a very particular piece of music and (spoiler alert) is a werewolf but that's where the similarities to his TV counterpart end.

The rest of Quentin's family from the 1897 television storyline are replaced by a much smaller band of weirdos. There's Conrad Collins, Quentin's disabled brother, who spends a bit too much time with his kennel of angry dogs. Haunting the upper floors of Collinwood is Erica Collins, Quentin's 100-year-old aunt and black magic enthusiast. Catherine Edmonds, a relative of one of Erica's former acolytes, is assigned to take care of the elderly maniac. And, last but not least, there's cousin Barnabas Collins who resides at the old house with his servant, Benson.

Not THAT Benson.
It's slowly revealed that Quentin's wife had her throat ripped out by an unidentified animal, as have a lot of other women who have gotten a little too close to him. Everyone is a suspect and the reader is given no solid clue (or any other kind of guidance) on how to solve this mystery. It might be a werewolf. It might be Quentin ... or his brother ... or ancient Aunt Erica ... or maybe even that nice Michael Green chap who Lara meets hanging around the family cemetery.

I know for a fact that guy in the middle is a werewolf
It might seem like a cheat on Ross's part but nobody reads these book because they present compelling mysteries. Their first (and possibly only) priority of these books is to conjure a romantic sense of dread ... Masterpiece Theatre versions of the old Universal monster movies, if you will. Which is lucky because this book comes to a crashing halt during the final four pages.

During one of his many "spells" Lara witnesses Quentin's transformation into a werewolf. Using a pistol given to her by Barnabas and Michael Green, she shoots Quentin moments before he leaps through a window and runs into the night (and out of the story.) Conrad seizes the opportunity to reveal that he and his dogs are the real killers of Quentin's female friends and is subsequently shot dead, himself, by Barnabas and Green.

As she's hustled onto the first ship out of Collinsport she's given a note from Barnabas. Even though he's been indulging her with talks of marriage he informs her that he can no longer see her. And that's pretty much the end.

Now, these books clearly have a page budget. Every book in the Dark Shadows series comes in between 150 and 160 pages, so it's likely Ross hit his limit and was forced to wrap the story with extreme prejudice. But that's a lot of story to get across in four pages, and the sins of omission are even worse. We never find out what happened to Quentin, or even learn where the curse came from. Rumors place the blame on gypsies but it's never said where, when or why it happened.

There's also the question of where the 1960s Collins clan came from when you consider the only member of the family still accounted for at the story's end is a 100-year-old woman. But anybody who's ever read one of Ross's Dark Shadows novels know not to pull at THAT loose thread.
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